Knowing how to introspect is a required course for a mature person.
the writer Martin has a sentence:
"True self-discipline is not outward, but inward.
all self-discipline is essentially self-discipline in thinking.
only when there is self-discipline in thinking and self-discipline in external behavior will it be natural.
here are four ways of thinking self-discipline to help you turn self-discipline into a habit.
restrain your desire to correct others
Lin Qingxuan once said, "Egrets stand in snow, fools see herons, wise people see snow, and wise men see white."
different people have different situations, different positions, and different views on the same thing.
I have heard such a story.
two people went to climb the mountain, one climbed to the top of the mountain and saw the sea.
while the other man only climbed halfway up the mountain, but mistakenly thought it was the top of the mountain.
when they went home, they communicated. The first person said that the scenery on the top of the mountain was the sea, while the other insisted that the scenery on the top of the mountain was trees.
in the end, no one could convince each other and broke up in discord.
you know, not all fish live in the same sea. People who don't understand you don't need an explanation, and people who know you don't need an explanation.
one day, painter Zhang Daqian held an exhibition in England.
in order to better show the effect, at the end of his pen, he sprayed it evenly on the paper with water in his mouth, and the peony, which was a little stiff, immediately became smart.
at this time, a man said angrily, "it turns out that Chinese painters paint by spitting!"
everyone turned to look at Zhang Daqian, but he just smiled.
afterwards, someone asked him, "you obviously used the method of ink flushing, why didn't you explain it at that time?"
Zhang Daqian said:
"Why should I argue with him?
if he knows anything about Chinese painting, I would like to discuss it.
people are already different, their cognitive levels are different, and they argue blindly, and as a result, you are consuming yourself.
philosopher Schopenhauer said: "when talking to others, refrain from correcting other people's impulses."
people who are really self-disciplined tend to be mature and rational.
they know very well that they don't have to waste time on these things, and that focusing on self-improvement is the most powerful response.
Don't live in other people's values
A story is told in the book never stop moving forward.
A female primary school teacher in the village, despite the crazy opposition of her parents and seven aunts and aunts, was determined to resign to take the postgraduate entrance examination.
she said she didn't want to live to be 60 in her 20s.
as a result, she failed the examination.
the next year, she still insisted on continuing to take the postgraduate entrance examination, and this time her fiance's family also threatened her to give up the postgraduate entrance examination with marriage.
she didn't compromise,
but failed again the second time.
the girl still didn't give up. She held up the cold words around her and finally succeeded in going ashore for the third time."in the days of waiting and suffering, I know more and more what I want," she said. "
this experience of the girl reminds me of what a professor taught me the year I graduated:
"I can't give you a foolproof rule of success, but I can tell you a rule of failure:
always try your best to please all
your life is never for others to see.
the value of your life must be realized by yourself.
living in the expectations of others is like putting yourself in a wooden boat without oars, wavering, drifting with the current, and never finding a way forward.
Yang Jiang once said: "We were so looking forward to the recognition of the outside world that we finally knew that the world was our own and had nothing to do with others."
Don't burden yourself with other people's questions. And don't entrust your future to others.
A bird standing on a tree never worries that the branch will suddenly break, because its strength comes from its own wings.
A man with light in his heart is never afraid that others will suddenly be cold, because his warmth comes from his self-confidence.
lighten the burden on your heart every day
have you ever felt this way?
sometimes I feel exhausted and tired at the end of the day.
when I think about it, I don't seem to have done anything very tired, and I always feel tired when I am hollowed out.To think too much is to torture yourself.
there was a new intern in the company, and the director of his department was strict in his work, and every copywriter supervisor would scrutinize and check it strictly.
it is common for a copywriter to be changed three or five times.
after several times, she began to panic and began to worry: "every day at work, I feel like a loser."
has been worrying about something that didn't happen:
this plan is not good. Will the next one be killed? If I am killed, will my colleagues laugh at me and will the leader fire me? If it passes, is it just a fluke? will you not be so lucky in the future?
these questions linger on her mind all the time, and she is exhausted before she begins to write.Soon after, she resigned.
later, oneIt was a pity that her colleagues mentioned her every time in the tea room, saying, "there is a lot of potential. If you polish it carefully, you will soon be able to do it on your own. I don't know how to resign."
most of the time, it is not unknown difficulties that hinder your action, but your superfluous ideas.
there is a "growth-opportunity" curve in Cognitive Breakthrough, which means that every stage of life has to go through a long period of accumulation.
A person who devotes all his energies to wishful thinking will naturally have no strength to take the first step.
this can never reach the condition to trigger the opportunity, and can only stay in the original circle all the time.
and life is like the road on the soles of your feet.
so be big and don't always embarrass yourself.
find a reason for everything from yourself
is there such a person around you?
if the work is not done well, the leader is unreliable;
the relationship is not good, it is the problem with colleagues;
the bad character is due to the original family.
I quite agree with one sentence:
it makes sense to find a problem in yourself, but it makes you crazy to think about it in others.
self-reflection is a person's most difficult self-discipline.
gymnastics champion Yang Wei once said in an interview that the national gymnastics team has a "wall of shame" that is 3.2 meters long and 1.5 meters high.
there are more than a dozen domestic media critical reports on the gymnastics team on the wall.
above the "Wall of Shame" hangs a huge banner, which is unforgettable for twenty-five months.
High-level people, when they encounter things, they always look for reasons from themselves first.
they take all kinds of criticism from the outside world as nourishment for their own growth, constantly analyze their own shortcomings, and accumulate experience in failure after failure.
Xu Pu, a bachelor of the Ming Dynasty, was talented and smart and studied hard from an early age.
he put two bottles on his desk, containing black beans and soybeans.
whenever you have a good thought in your heart and do a good deed, you will throw a soy bean.
on the contrary, if you have bad thoughts in your heart and your words and deeds are at fault, throw a black bean.
if there are more black beans and less soybeans, he will constantly reflect on and motivate himself.
with this lasting restraint and encouragement, he continued to cultivate and improve himself, and finally became a generation of famous officials with high morality and respect.
self-examination is a required course for a mature person.
only by inward attribution can we grow outward.
there is a passage in "as much self-discipline as you are free":
the meaning of self-discipline is to formulate a set of principles of doing things and to establish a stable and regular rhythm and order by virtue of strong willpower and persistence. Only in this way can one be truly free.
self-discipline does not only mean being beautiful and thinner, but also an attitude towards life and the ability of self-management.
so I have always believed that mental self-discipline is far more important than physical self-discipline.
", talk to yourself every day, break from the inside and grow outward.