The important thing is to live your life in your own way.
have read a sentence:
"if you live in other people's eyes, you will die in other people's mouths.
in life, we often magnify the words of others indefinitely, while repeatedly narrowing our feelings.
when others give you a compliment, you immediately smile like a flower, and when others question or deny it, you can't help explaining it.
but people are unfathomable and difficult to tune. No matter how you explain it, there will always be people who don't like you.
Li ao once said: "sometimes an explanation is unnecessary: enemies do not believe your explanation, but friends do not need your explanation."
those who understand you do not need to explain themselves, while those who do not understand you are still pale and powerless.
the three values are different, so there is no need to explain
@ Li Xin
shared one thing:
after Li Xin's aunt retired, she had nothing to do every day, so she recycled waste in the community.
half of it is for something to do so as to exercise.
half of them want to donate the income from picking up waste to charity to add some meaning to life.
whether it is cold winter or hot summer, my aunt always carries a bag and cleans up near the trash can.
Auntie is a fastidious person. She dresses neatly to pick up waste every day, and she also sprays alcohol on the waste.
it is this fastidiousness that makes her a topic of conversation for many people after tea and dinner.
some people say that an old lady who picks up garbage and wears a jade bracelet must be a fake.
someone pointed at her and taught her children, "if you don't study hard, you'll have to pick up garbage when you get old, just like her."
once, Li Xin visited her aunt. She and her aunt just walked into the elevator with their cardboard boxes and mineral water bottles.
the people in the elevator covered their noses and said, "it stinks. There are everyone in the community, and the security guard doesn't care."
Li Xin was about to argue, but her aunt grabbed her.
when he got home, Li Xin asked his aunt, "it's obviously tasteless, why don't you explain it?"
Auntie smiled calmly and said, "some people look down on garbage pickers from their hearts, and it's useless for you to say more."
in the world of candles, light bulbs are sinful.
some people only want to believe what they want to believe, so it is difficult to empathize with others.
your frugality has become stingy to him, your liveliness has become frivolous to him, and your helplessness has become hypocritical from his point of view.
the three values are different, and you can't argue with a hundred mouths.
No matter how much you explain, you can't be accepted. Instead, it becomes sophistry.
Mr. Lu Xun said: "only silence is the highest contempt."
the same world, in the eyes of different people, is a different color.
demeanor of life, there is no need to explain to people with different values. Silence is the best response to contempt.
position is different, there is no need to explain
Guo Degang once said a jingle:
"in the first month, three brothers went to see the lamp, the deaf led the blind, and the cripple followed closely.
the deaf said that the lights did not go off this year, while the blind said that the lights were unknown this year.
the cripple said, you are both wrong. The lights are bright and the road is rough. "
people from different positions can never depict the same picture.
when director Wong Kar-wai was filming the True Story of Alfie, she was extremely dissatisfied with Carina Lau.
there is a scene of scrubbing the floor on her knees. Carina Lau took many pictures over and over again, but Wong Kar-wai was not satisfied and kept doing it all over again.
Carina Lau could only wipe it over and over again until her clothes were wet with sweat, and she couldn't help getting angry, "what do you want?"
Wong Kar-wai did not explain, but only said, "No, it just doesn't feel right."
there was no way, so Carina Lau had to keep scrubbing the floor 27 times, and he was finally satisfied.After filming, although Carina Lau mentioned the matter many times, Wong Kar-wai did not explain it to her.
until the explosion of the True Story of Alfie, the scene of wiping the floor became a classic.
Carina Lau woke up and said, "Wong Kar-wai is a person who pays great attention to feelings. He doesn't explain it because the plot can be explained, but the emotion is very difficult to explain."
there are some things that are different from each other, and it is difficult to explain clearly.
not all things are right or wrong, and most of the time they just take different positions.
there is a good saying on the Internet:
Life is not easy, individual demands are different, and their positions are different. Don't practice yourself in the hearts of others, and don't force others in your own hearts.
everyone's situation is different, it is difficult to see eye to eye, everyone's position is different, and it is difficult to understand each other.
all this is exactly what Haruki Murakami said:
"there is sorrow in the world that cannot shed tears, which cannot be explained to others, even if it is explained.
others will not understand what you want, let alone see through your heart. Since they cannot be understood, why bother to explain
instead of wasting your mind on explanation, be loyal to yourself in a limited edition of time.
the pattern is different, so there is no need to explain
the so-called pattern is actually the breadth of your horizons, the depth of your thinking, the height of your pursuit of goals, and the leisurely magnanimity embodied in you.
We have been paying for the pattern all our lives..
the larger the pattern, the more open-minded and at ease; the smaller the pattern, the narrower the heart and the darker the belly.
there is a well-known chess player, excellent chess skills, there are often a lot of people to visit.
one day, he was studying a chess game in the yard when a strange guest came to visit him.
No sooner had the guest entered the door than he asked a question: "I heard that you know most about go in the world. Do you know how many pieces there are in the chess box?"
after hearing this, the chess player calmly said: "181 sunspots, 180 whites, a total of 361."As soon as the voice fell, the guest laughed up to the sky and retorted, "you're wrong!" There are only 360. "
then, the guest reached out and put a chess piece in front of the chess player.
it turns out that the guest secretly took a piece from the chessboard when the chess player wasn't looking.
the students of chess players can't help arguing with the guests when they see that the guests are deliberately looking for trouble.The chess player disagreed, asked the students to stand down, apologized and said, "you're right. I'm really wrong."
at this time, the guest was proudly coquettish and boasted, "well, I beat you!"
then he left contentedly.
the student was puzzled and complained, "this man is clearly making trouble, why don't you make it clear?"
the chess player explained, "Why do you argue with him and waste your time when you know he is vexatious?"
the mindset is different, and the pattern stands out.
people standing on tall buildings can see the blue sky and their hearts are far away.
and the people standing downstairs are covered with dust and mockery in their hearts.
with different patterns and levels, there is no need to say much.
Lincoln once said, "anyone who is determined to achieve something will never waste his time in private arguments."
the grass moves according to the direction of the wind, the big tree is never afraid of wind and rain, and the man of the big pattern will never be confined to the remarks of others.
being yourself in silence is far more important than explaining and proving.
never explain yourself to others
writer Liu Tong once said:
"I used to explain and theory, for fear of offending others, for fear of being destroyed, and for those small feelings that kept jumping around.
now do not explain, do not go to the theory, still afraid, afraid of wasting their own time, afraid of blurring the focus, afraid of affecting the taste of earthly life
in other people's eyes, there is no road you want to take, and your favorite flowers cannot bloom in other people's mouths.
instead of busy explaining in the mouths of others, it is better to be alone in your own world.
the rest of your life is not long and time is expensive. Never explain yourself to others.
if the heart does not move, there is no fear of the wind.
it doesn't matter what others say in one's life. The important thing is to live a good life in your own way.